Running Has Claimed Me - Straight Up

My system has been all screwed for the past few days. Trying to switch from living during the night to living during the day is straight up tough. This past weekend was a work weekend and I ended up only getting < 3 hours of sleep to go do this kamakaze aerobic workout for squadron PT. During the workout my head felt like a cotton ball and I saw white spots so I was unable to finish the workout which I am still pissed about. Although I usually shun excuses I think the reason why I fell out of the workout was because of lack of sleep, sleep pattern change, improper dehydration, prior fatigue since the two days before I had an amazing 8.5 mile run which lit me up. However, in time I will be back up to par.

Running has claimed me. It is official. Lifting weights is fun and it makes me look in shape but it is when I run that happiness sparks thus igniting a release from the world around me. When you run, at least when my feet hit the pavement, it is just you and the ground, you and your stride; nothing else. People may run with you perhaps causing you to run faster or longer. We all know competition prompts excellaration of some sort. With me though it is all about battling who I am, forging pride within myself. Since entering the USAF and furthering certain relationships(Audrey, Henderson, Aaron Toledo) my pride has gone up. One always has self doubts though. It keeps us in check.

Lastnight I was cruising around on MySpace, searching for a time killer when in my search there were some people from highschool that used to be my friends that no longer are. Looking back I am ashamed of myself that I was even intertwined with these people because they have no concept of self respect thus they have no respect for others and that in my opinion is where all conflicts occur. Anyways after seeing all their blogs I wanted to knock them down and show them how stupid they are. Put myself above them. It may sound wrong but it is what I want to do. These people wronged me very much and what do I want to do to show them all out - I want to race them in a run - straight up - it is weird - it is my mentallity - straight up.