Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Done with School, Back @ Home, Venturing West
Don't worry, I am alive and doing quite well. I have finally graduated from tech school in MS and am now back in Maine for a little while before I go to Beale AFB, CA. My friends at Keesler were unlike any other friends that I have ever had before. The comradery and sense of friendship that existed between my class and I was unlike anything else that I have ever experienced. Life is very good. When I get a normal subscription to the net where I am able to update the blog more regularly with posts I will do so. Until then thank you everyone for everything...you know who you are.
Friday, October 21, 2005
Ok....So it has been Forever
I am still alive so no one has to worry. The internet has not been the most available commodity in the past month. Anyway I am back at the 338th squadron and not mixed in with all of the other jobs. School is going really well. When we went back to school I started in block 5 of 10 and now we are going into block 8 on monday and friday we will be starting the infamous make/break block 9. I have really put myself into high gear for the past two blocks as far as studying and concentration goes. Tech school is different from any other learning environment I have been in. In high school it was about knowing the info for the test to pass the course and not much more. Whereas here in tech school it is about knowing how to do your job and being the most well rounded in your skills as possible. People are depending on you to know the info. Working the teams like we do on certain exercises building & configuring computer networks the communication is key. Just working with the people I am with prompts me to do better even when I get discouraged which happens very often.
My grandfather passed away this earlier this week. I saw him often growing up but for the most part he and my grandmother lived in Florida. As a teenager I had only seen him a few times...only a few times to pick up on how he really was. He had cancer and was a heavy smoker and drinker. After joining the military though I understand certain things about him more so than I did before. I remember when I saw him last he asked me "are you proud of who you are," I was unsure of where he was going and somewhat puzzled but I remember nodding my head and he said "than stand up straight and dont slouch." He told me about things I would learn while in the military or more specifically basic training.
"You'll always be hungry in basic training....you'll be proud of who you are...it doesnt matter color they are, what they like to do, or where they're from. When their in your platoon you are family and thats it. You dont need to like 'em yuou just need to go to war with 'em" Although in the USAF we don't have platoons; I totally understand what he meant. People will be around that you may not like or that u may not get along with but when something needs to be done you need to be able to get it done with them. And thats it.
I may be going home before my grad date for his funeral and service but I hope it will be held off until around thanksgiving. That way I will be able graduate with my current class and be home for thanksgiving with my full family on both sides. If that sounds selfish I am sorry but that is just how I hope it turns out. The sooner I am out of here the better and being able to going home only once and paying my respects will be easier than going home for 48 hours, coming back to MS than heading back in 2-3 weeks.
Things are happening as they always do. Next time I can grab an internet connection I will document the things that resonate in my mind @ that particular time. Until then god bless all of you.
My grandfather passed away this earlier this week. I saw him often growing up but for the most part he and my grandmother lived in Florida. As a teenager I had only seen him a few times...only a few times to pick up on how he really was. He had cancer and was a heavy smoker and drinker. After joining the military though I understand certain things about him more so than I did before. I remember when I saw him last he asked me "are you proud of who you are," I was unsure of where he was going and somewhat puzzled but I remember nodding my head and he said "than stand up straight and dont slouch." He told me about things I would learn while in the military or more specifically basic training.
"You'll always be hungry in basic training....you'll be proud of who you are...it doesnt matter color they are, what they like to do, or where they're from. When their in your platoon you are family and thats it. You dont need to like 'em yuou just need to go to war with 'em" Although in the USAF we don't have platoons; I totally understand what he meant. People will be around that you may not like or that u may not get along with but when something needs to be done you need to be able to get it done with them. And thats it.
I may be going home before my grad date for his funeral and service but I hope it will be held off until around thanksgiving. That way I will be able graduate with my current class and be home for thanksgiving with my full family on both sides. If that sounds selfish I am sorry but that is just how I hope it turns out. The sooner I am out of here the better and being able to going home only once and paying my respects will be easier than going home for 48 hours, coming back to MS than heading back in 2-3 weeks.
Things are happening as they always do. Next time I can grab an internet connection I will document the things that resonate in my mind @ that particular time. Until then god bless all of you.
Saturday, September 17, 2005
Lullaby
One of the carnal suggestions that I heard before and during my entry into the military was "do not volunteer for anything." Well I volunteered to stay behind and "help the community" when all I really did was move furniture, pick up trash and rake leafes and never leave the friggin base. I apologize for my poor attitude but I have found out that the USAF has shipped all of the people who were in training with me for my career feild to their first duty stations. If I had not volunteered I would not still be on Keesler AFB not able to leave the gates, I would be a permanent party Airmen not a student, I would be doing my job hands on training and not run the risk of failing a test and getting kicked out of my career feild and I would be in Sacremento California. Run on Sentence!!!! But I volunteered and stayed cuase thats what I do, and I would not change that fact @ all. I am here so be it. I am fortunate to have stayed.
One of my favorite people in the entire world called me today, Britt Delaney who I met on my life changing trip to Great Britian. She is easily one of the sweetest people period as well as quite the looker. We chatted for a while and just caught up on some of the small stuff that supports all the big stuff. Just being able to hear someone's voice that is instantly recognizable even though u have not heard it for so long is like a lullaby that was sang to you as a child resung to you as an adult. It delivers the same feelings and activates the same instincts as when it serenaded you earlier in your life. Britt has one of those voices. I associate her and the times we had with the period in my life so far. To be able to have her call me and talk to her allowed me to breathe for the first time in 3 weeks. She was what I needed since my peers and I are starting school on Monday and we all needed a breather.
One of my favorite people in the entire world called me today, Britt Delaney who I met on my life changing trip to Great Britian. She is easily one of the sweetest people period as well as quite the looker. We chatted for a while and just caught up on some of the small stuff that supports all the big stuff. Just being able to hear someone's voice that is instantly recognizable even though u have not heard it for so long is like a lullaby that was sang to you as a child resung to you as an adult. It delivers the same feelings and activates the same instincts as when it serenaded you earlier in your life. Britt has one of those voices. I associate her and the times we had with the period in my life so far. To be able to have her call me and talk to her allowed me to breathe for the first time in 3 weeks. She was what I needed since my peers and I are starting school on Monday and we all needed a breather.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Closure
I am no longer in limbo and it is very nice. Today SMSgt(Senior Master Sergeant) Caveneau came and briefed us on what exactly is happening to us concerning our job training and here is the list of goals the 81st training group has planned for:
1. Bring 400 of the 1100 airmen that were sent away 3 weeks ago back to Keesler to continue training in the jobs that are in high demand for the USAF. Air Traffic Controllers, Ground Radio, PC Networking(my AFSC), weather, etc.
2. Bring airmen from basic training to Keesler for thier job training.
3. Get life somewhat back to normal here @ Keesler AFB.
I know that life here in the gulf coast region will not be the way it was before the hurricane for years to come. So pretty much life here @ Keesler will totally sucks more than it did pre-Katrina however my peers and I are happy that they are atleast bringing our friends back from Texas and the other bases they were shipped off to for training. A wonderful reunion will commence.
Today my detail team was suppossed to go off base and give rations, water, supplies and clothing to shelters in the area. This would have been the first any of us have left the base in the last 3.5 weeks. However the transport that was suppossed to come and pick my Team up never showed up so we sat around in the Fish Tank(the area in the squadron where there is satellite TV and Halo 2 tournaments) and watched the films Top Gun and Shawn of the Dead. For the most part it was a complete waste of my day because although they were both entertaining films I would much rather be outside working and contributing something than watching TV. As I told my close friend Henderson, I get up in the morning to do something, not sit around on my ass.
Life is better here at Keesler. Especially since our briefing w/ the SMSgt. One of the major things that strike me with the upper enlisted core is that they deliver no smoke screens and shovel no bullshit. Any one who knows me knows that I can be a good bullshitter. You can't bullshit a bullshitter. What SMSgt said to my squadron today was direct and to the point and might not have been what everyone wanted to hear but it gave people closure. It was definitive. Now that my squadron has closure, each of us will have to look into our own experience, values and disciplines to see what we want and need from our future.
1. Bring 400 of the 1100 airmen that were sent away 3 weeks ago back to Keesler to continue training in the jobs that are in high demand for the USAF. Air Traffic Controllers, Ground Radio, PC Networking(my AFSC), weather, etc.
2. Bring airmen from basic training to Keesler for thier job training.
3. Get life somewhat back to normal here @ Keesler AFB.
I know that life here in the gulf coast region will not be the way it was before the hurricane for years to come. So pretty much life here @ Keesler will totally sucks more than it did pre-Katrina however my peers and I are happy that they are atleast bringing our friends back from Texas and the other bases they were shipped off to for training. A wonderful reunion will commence.
Today my detail team was suppossed to go off base and give rations, water, supplies and clothing to shelters in the area. This would have been the first any of us have left the base in the last 3.5 weeks. However the transport that was suppossed to come and pick my Team up never showed up so we sat around in the Fish Tank(the area in the squadron where there is satellite TV and Halo 2 tournaments) and watched the films Top Gun and Shawn of the Dead. For the most part it was a complete waste of my day because although they were both entertaining films I would much rather be outside working and contributing something than watching TV. As I told my close friend Henderson, I get up in the morning to do something, not sit around on my ass.
Life is better here at Keesler. Especially since our briefing w/ the SMSgt. One of the major things that strike me with the upper enlisted core is that they deliver no smoke screens and shovel no bullshit. Any one who knows me knows that I can be a good bullshitter. You can't bullshit a bullshitter. What SMSgt said to my squadron today was direct and to the point and might not have been what everyone wanted to hear but it gave people closure. It was definitive. Now that my squadron has closure, each of us will have to look into our own experience, values and disciplines to see what we want and need from our future.
Saturday, September 10, 2005
the realization
We went into the Bryant Hall shelter Sunday night @ 1900(7:00pm)
The shelter lost power sometime during the night. While on door guard to make sure no one would try to leave the shelter I witnessed roof tiles being ripped off of airplane hangers and swirl through the air like fallen leaves in autumn. We watched windows on cars get blown out by small pebbles that we couldn't even see...it just looked like the wind was doing it itself. The hurricane had not made landfall yet.
We were able to leave the shelter tuesday morning around 1000. It was nice to have clean air and not be so conjested. Then began the realization-
The gazeebo by the track was totally destroyed, giant trees were twisted & deformed to the point where the trunk just looked like a girl's long braid of hair. The base exchange had 8 feet of water in it, the two main gates were destroyed(there were no more guard shacks), there was no more civil engineering warehouse, it was as if the building was never fully completed. It just looked like the workers built the frame to the building and that was it, everything else was ripped clean away. The realization was that the state of mississippi had no power, the bay of biloxi where I was located had lost one of its two bridges to the main land, it had no power or running water. Finally there were 9 casinos in biloxi ms, there are now 5.
Thursday morning @ 0145 they woke us up for an emergency formation where my squadron was told that the 81 Training Group could not afford to keep 1500 non prior service airmen @ Keesler AFB, training isnt suppossed to reconvene until April 2006. The realization is that we had to pack 1 bag because the rest of our possessions would be mailed to us. We were flying out to two AFBs in TX to be either reclassed into a new job or be dealt with some other way.
They asked for 125 volunteers to stay behind and help with the clean up...I stayed.
I said good bye to my friends who I have called my family since the first day of basic training six months ago.
The president, sec. of def., cheif of staff of the USAF, and a plethora of other politicians came to Keesler to look @ the damage. All of you have seen it on TV.
I am now apart of a group of 400 airmen who stayed behind to help clean up. Our morale is higher than a bunch of sixth weekers in BMT. The work we are doing is giving some people hope and enthusiam for the work and times ahead. We are cleaning up the base, helping it to become operational again. There is so much more to say - now we have gotten power back and they have set up some free internet access for people to utilize. More will come.
The realization is this - I am an Airmen in the United States Air Force. I wake in the morning thankful for everything God gives me. I have been raised seeing those people who are less fortunate than myself. The Air Force is now allowing me dare to be great. Through placing my integrity first I find myself placing my service and duty before my own aspirations. When my brethren needs my help, it is my duty not only as an Airmen but as a fellow person to go to their aid. I will be here as long as I can. Katrina brought in alot of messages with her winds, one of them was the realization that I am an Airman in the United States Air Force.
The shelter lost power sometime during the night. While on door guard to make sure no one would try to leave the shelter I witnessed roof tiles being ripped off of airplane hangers and swirl through the air like fallen leaves in autumn. We watched windows on cars get blown out by small pebbles that we couldn't even see...it just looked like the wind was doing it itself. The hurricane had not made landfall yet.
We were able to leave the shelter tuesday morning around 1000. It was nice to have clean air and not be so conjested. Then began the realization-
The gazeebo by the track was totally destroyed, giant trees were twisted & deformed to the point where the trunk just looked like a girl's long braid of hair. The base exchange had 8 feet of water in it, the two main gates were destroyed(there were no more guard shacks), there was no more civil engineering warehouse, it was as if the building was never fully completed. It just looked like the workers built the frame to the building and that was it, everything else was ripped clean away. The realization was that the state of mississippi had no power, the bay of biloxi where I was located had lost one of its two bridges to the main land, it had no power or running water. Finally there were 9 casinos in biloxi ms, there are now 5.
Thursday morning @ 0145 they woke us up for an emergency formation where my squadron was told that the 81 Training Group could not afford to keep 1500 non prior service airmen @ Keesler AFB, training isnt suppossed to reconvene until April 2006. The realization is that we had to pack 1 bag because the rest of our possessions would be mailed to us. We were flying out to two AFBs in TX to be either reclassed into a new job or be dealt with some other way.
They asked for 125 volunteers to stay behind and help with the clean up...I stayed.
I said good bye to my friends who I have called my family since the first day of basic training six months ago.
The president, sec. of def., cheif of staff of the USAF, and a plethora of other politicians came to Keesler to look @ the damage. All of you have seen it on TV.
I am now apart of a group of 400 airmen who stayed behind to help clean up. Our morale is higher than a bunch of sixth weekers in BMT. The work we are doing is giving some people hope and enthusiam for the work and times ahead. We are cleaning up the base, helping it to become operational again. There is so much more to say - now we have gotten power back and they have set up some free internet access for people to utilize. More will come.
The realization is this - I am an Airmen in the United States Air Force. I wake in the morning thankful for everything God gives me. I have been raised seeing those people who are less fortunate than myself. The Air Force is now allowing me dare to be great. Through placing my integrity first I find myself placing my service and duty before my own aspirations. When my brethren needs my help, it is my duty not only as an Airmen but as a fellow person to go to their aid. I will be here as long as I can. Katrina brought in alot of messages with her winds, one of them was the realization that I am an Airman in the United States Air Force.
Sunday, August 28, 2005
There's a Storm A Comin'
Wow, so much has happened since the last post.....
My squadron, the 338th Dark Knights are here the longest for training. We also have the highest test scores within the triangle(the campus area is called the triangle) so for some reason people in the 338th feel that they can drink alcohol underage and then drive a car. However the mississippi law enforcement community as well as Keesler AFB security forces division feel otherwise. More Dark Knights have been caught w/ DUIs than any other squadron in the triangle so we had to have a mandatory alcohol awareness training on our day off. It was long and useless in my opinion. The info given is the same info everyone heard before prom night in highschool and during their D.A.R.E. program in middle school. My view is that the people who are going to drink alcohol irresponsibly & underage are going to do it no matter what repititious lecture you give them. Some people need lectures on basic decision making not the effects of alcohol.
Then after the breifing I had to go pull floor gaurd @ the squadron for 6 hours. My duties being to make sure no one lights the building on fire or does anything crazy. It is useless for the most part seeing as how per a MTL(military training leader) there has never been such an act in the history of any AF training installation. But if people in the Army would do it to their buildings, obviously people the in the AF would do it to their buildings. On a serious note, I see their point but living in the dorm my peers and I know that the floor gaurd shift is uncalled for.
Finally my weekend started on Friday night @ 6:15, I went to Cajun's fabulous fried chicken buffet and it was out of this world good. My friend Henderson joined me and let me tell you that restaurant lost $ when we walked through those doors. Then we went to the mall and I purchased the John Cusack film "Say Anything" which is such a ridulously great movie I suggest everyone see it. Anyone who really knows me, really knows about my past and who I am as a person will agree that I am the main character Lloyd Dobbs. He is I as I am him. He is a warrior of optimism, long winded but good with words, loves music(he listens to the replacements for god sakes), kick boxes, is a gentemen, friends w/ mostly women & knows them better then most men, is known as the all around nice guy. People, is that not me?
On Saturday I volunteered with some other people from my squadron painting bleachers, snack shacks, and bathrooms @ a local pee wee football feild. It was a lot of fun and very rewarding. Being able to work outside, play with some of the little kids, and see and someplace that I had yet to go was awesome.
Today the entire gulfcoast is preparing for the arrival of Katrina. She is expected to set down overnight Sunday into Monday morning so we will be sheltering tonight after formation most likely. W/ 175 mph winds she is going to be a bitch. Yeah base clean up. I am going to round off this very long blog entry - Do yourself a favor and rent the movie "Say Anything" and off I go into total confinement for the next 24-36 hours.
My squadron, the 338th Dark Knights are here the longest for training. We also have the highest test scores within the triangle(the campus area is called the triangle) so for some reason people in the 338th feel that they can drink alcohol underage and then drive a car. However the mississippi law enforcement community as well as Keesler AFB security forces division feel otherwise. More Dark Knights have been caught w/ DUIs than any other squadron in the triangle so we had to have a mandatory alcohol awareness training on our day off. It was long and useless in my opinion. The info given is the same info everyone heard before prom night in highschool and during their D.A.R.E. program in middle school. My view is that the people who are going to drink alcohol irresponsibly & underage are going to do it no matter what repititious lecture you give them. Some people need lectures on basic decision making not the effects of alcohol.
Then after the breifing I had to go pull floor gaurd @ the squadron for 6 hours. My duties being to make sure no one lights the building on fire or does anything crazy. It is useless for the most part seeing as how per a MTL(military training leader) there has never been such an act in the history of any AF training installation. But if people in the Army would do it to their buildings, obviously people the in the AF would do it to their buildings. On a serious note, I see their point but living in the dorm my peers and I know that the floor gaurd shift is uncalled for.
Finally my weekend started on Friday night @ 6:15, I went to Cajun's fabulous fried chicken buffet and it was out of this world good. My friend Henderson joined me and let me tell you that restaurant lost $ when we walked through those doors. Then we went to the mall and I purchased the John Cusack film "Say Anything" which is such a ridulously great movie I suggest everyone see it. Anyone who really knows me, really knows about my past and who I am as a person will agree that I am the main character Lloyd Dobbs. He is I as I am him. He is a warrior of optimism, long winded but good with words, loves music(he listens to the replacements for god sakes), kick boxes, is a gentemen, friends w/ mostly women & knows them better then most men, is known as the all around nice guy. People, is that not me?
On Saturday I volunteered with some other people from my squadron painting bleachers, snack shacks, and bathrooms @ a local pee wee football feild. It was a lot of fun and very rewarding. Being able to work outside, play with some of the little kids, and see and someplace that I had yet to go was awesome.
Today the entire gulfcoast is preparing for the arrival of Katrina. She is expected to set down overnight Sunday into Monday morning so we will be sheltering tonight after formation most likely. W/ 175 mph winds she is going to be a bitch. Yeah base clean up. I am going to round off this very long blog entry - Do yourself a favor and rent the movie "Say Anything" and off I go into total confinement for the next 24-36 hours.
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Two Reminders from the Divine
Although I was raised going to church with my mother most people who know me know that I am not a particularly religious person. I lean more towards the spiritual side of things versus organized doctrine. Anyways what happened today was definitely effected by some sort of higher power let me tell you!
Today was my block test for block 4: IP addressing. I had a really good grasp on the classwork & homework but when I was given the appraisal I did not really know where to start or how to build an IP address from some network id or any of the other jargon that was crammed into my brain. It was also found that a few other people felt the same way I did so at least I was not the only one.
After going over the homework and asking the teacher a number of questions the test started and I was totally 'out of control' was we like to say in the Air Force. The test was a learning experience in that I could have studied alot more than I had. Anyways I was sure that I was going to fail and get either washed back in the block or even worse yet very realistic discharge. But I finished the test and the teacher said that I barely passed - which I barely did w/ a 70. A higher power of some sort was looking down on me because man should I have failed this test. My heart was just preparing itself for a puncture and my guts psyching themselves into getting kicked out. But I passed so I will be going onto block 5 with all of my friends. After looking back over the test I dont understand how I passed other than having a divine light shed a little brighter over certain educated guesses that I made.
Later in the day - I just thought it was kind of funny. I was sitting for the bus to arrive while there was a huge thunder & rain storm forming. Contemplating the test earlier in the day I just had the thought of how the 'divine being' showed himself to me today by allowing me pass that test. As I got onto the bus the downpoor started and there were rolls & rolls of thunder. Grabbing a seat I saw a flash of lightning and I thought "oh thats just another reminder of who helped me pass today."
Today was my block test for block 4: IP addressing. I had a really good grasp on the classwork & homework but when I was given the appraisal I did not really know where to start or how to build an IP address from some network id or any of the other jargon that was crammed into my brain. It was also found that a few other people felt the same way I did so at least I was not the only one.
After going over the homework and asking the teacher a number of questions the test started and I was totally 'out of control' was we like to say in the Air Force. The test was a learning experience in that I could have studied alot more than I had. Anyways I was sure that I was going to fail and get either washed back in the block or even worse yet very realistic discharge. But I finished the test and the teacher said that I barely passed - which I barely did w/ a 70. A higher power of some sort was looking down on me because man should I have failed this test. My heart was just preparing itself for a puncture and my guts psyching themselves into getting kicked out. But I passed so I will be going onto block 5 with all of my friends. After looking back over the test I dont understand how I passed other than having a divine light shed a little brighter over certain educated guesses that I made.
Later in the day - I just thought it was kind of funny. I was sitting for the bus to arrive while there was a huge thunder & rain storm forming. Contemplating the test earlier in the day I just had the thought of how the 'divine being' showed himself to me today by allowing me pass that test. As I got onto the bus the downpoor started and there were rolls & rolls of thunder. Grabbing a seat I saw a flash of lightning and I thought "oh thats just another reminder of who helped me pass today."
Monday, August 22, 2005
Starting the Journal on My Birthday
My life consists of 0330 formations where I not only condition my body but prepare my mind for the tasks at hand for the 13 hour work day that is to come. Haste is usually the word that defines my life during the weekdays. Before entering the Air Force it was important to me to get in as much into the day as I could. Having gone through basic military training I now understand what Gandalf means when he says "...show the meaning of haste." It is true that in the military one does more before 8:00am than most civilians due in their whole day. With all the verses, choruses and bridges that compose my day I felt it would be appropriate to start a blog -
Inspired by E. Horne.
Inspired by E. Horne.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
